"you choose your favourite character because they remind you of yourself"
alfred is 19 in human years
imagine how fucking hard he laughed when the watergate scandal was happening and he found out the codename for the informant was “deep throat” because hes a fucking dudebro child
This professor could not find a projector and drew the map of the world himself.
and my personal favorite
Europe according to penis size
YEAH, OKAY NOOOO, STOP THIS FRANCE, IT’S PENIS, NOT THE EIFFEL
It took me awhile to work out that this was in centimeters
I was like what the fuck Europe
how was this study carried out though, that’s the real story
"LET US MEASURE YOUR WILLY GOOD SIR!
It took me awhile to work out that this was in centimeters…only in America
Oh God I also didn’t realise it was centimetres and I was like Jesus Christ Europe, how are your women and gay bottoms not dead
No so there are these two construction workers at my house and tHEY ARE A FREAKING COUPLE AND I SWEAR THEY ARE SO CUTE and so I came down stairs and I guess they didn’t hear me cause they were talking and the one guy was like ‘babe can you hand me that hammer’ and the other one was like ‘which one’ while look at him suggestively and the other one got all flustered and embarrassed he was like ‘babe, later’. I SWEAR THEY ARE FREAKIN ADORABLE.